Last week I got into a confrontational conversation with one of my doctors. He’s one of my favorites. And even though I wanted to walk away, as I typically would, I couldn’t.

“So you are a Christian,” he taunted.

I smiled and I started to respond, but he kept going.

“Think about it, my dear,” he said, “do we cling to our childish Jesus-God fantasies because they are, perhaps, the last such fantasies it’s ok to keep?”

I should have been incested. This guy was calling my God Santa! My mouth gaped, gasping for a response. None was forthcoming, so I stood there, head titled and kept listening.

“Are our beliefs grounded in truth,” he asked, “or is the center of religion the power of human reason?”

Again I scanned my mind but intelligent response was elusive.

” You know,” he continued, “at the time Jesus supposedly ascended into heaven, people believed the earth was 3 tiered – Earth, Sky and Heaven… well, four if you count Hell below, which is probably still feasible…But it’s a widely accepted scientific fact today that the earth is round, so if Jesus had ascended into heaven he’s probably still careening past some asteriod in the galaxy. “

The conversation got me thinking and I’ve been scouring through text to decipher it. How do I reconcile my scientific view point with my spiritual center? Are the concepts of the bibilical story of creation and the theory of evolution mutually exclusive?

Why Christianity Must Change or Die?, a National Best Seller by an Episcopal Bishop, John Shelby Spong, addresses these very issue, and more. In this highly controversial hit, Spong calls himself a believer in exile, a title I all too often can also relate to. He tries to make sense of the divine-human interaction in a way that is accessible to the highly progressive minds of this day and age.

The theistic image of God the Father, Protector and Punisher, imbued in me since childhood makes me hesitant to challenge my beliefs beacause I fear I might be punished. But I refuse to believe the God who granted me my mind restricts me from using it. And I refuse to switch faith in my search of substance. So here I am, spiritually caught between a rock and a hard place.

I’ve had this conversation with someone I respect, a highly intelligent die-hard scientist and Christian. In the end he concluded that he is a Christian because to him, being a disciple of Jesus does not require him to make a literalized credal affirmation of a theistic God who supposedly invaded our world and lived among us for a time in the person of Jesus. It only requires him to be empowered by him, to imitate the presence of God in him by living fully, loving wholly and having the courage to be all God created him to be. It means that we can, will commune with God only to the degree that we can give our lives, our love and being away to others.

I have to say, I agree.